Your Daily Horoscopes for August 3

We see the world through the subjective filters of our own imagination today. We begin to lose objectivity when the Moon swims into watery Pisces at 9:57 am EDT. The fluidity of compassion and spirit are common to us all as the Moon moves through the sign of the Fish, and her midday conjunction with otherworldly Neptune again reminds us that the seas dissolve boundaries. We are more empathic now since there is only one ocean of consciousness.

 

Aries Horoscope
Aries Horoscope (Mar 21 – Apr 19)

Confusion may arise today as fast as you can gain clarity. Every question you answer just peels off another layer of the growing onion. Seeking positive solutions may feel like a hopeless battle. However, it’s good to remember that with strength and determination, Hercules was able to defeat the Hydra who grew two new heads each time one was cut off. You can be the hero of your own world if you summon your courage from the wellsprings within.

Taurus Horoscope
Taurus Horoscope (Apr 20 – May 20)

It’s difficult to get a handle on the day today as circumstances keep changing. However, the greatest challenges may come from your friends or associates now because of the Moon’s presence in your 11th House of Social Networking. You’re ready to withdraw and separate yourself from the group if others aren’t sensible and reliable. But you don’t have to move so fast; there are goodies to be discovered if you allow enough time to untangle the complexities before giving up.

Gemini Horoscope
Gemini Horoscope (May 21 – Jun 20)

It can be disarming if your data aims you one way while an intuitive hunch suggests that you should be doing something else. It’s hard to know what to do, since you tend to ultimately rely on the facts. Instead of jumping to any conclusions, consider all your possibilities until your feelings are more aligned with the circumstances. You’ll feel better about what your choice if you wait before swinging into action.

Cancer Horoscope
Cancer Horoscope (June 21 – Jul 22)

You have gathered all the necessary information and have successfully withheld your feelings as you developed your plan. Although you can be very patient when needed, you grow so restless today that you don’t want to wait any longer. However, you may be more focused on your ideal fantasy now than you are on reality. You’ve made it this far, so don’t blow it by acting too soon. The turning point is next week.

Leo Horoscope
Leo Horoscope (Jul 23 – Aug 22)

What someone else says today can wound you, but it’s crucial to look past the current circumstance and carefully consider the true source of the pain. Think about any past situations that are brought to mind by the current situation. Explore your resistance to letting go of the past. But the real work in not about remembering; it’s about bringing your memories out into the open so healing can occur. Acknowledging the truth brings resolution.

Virgo Horoscope
Virgo Horoscope (Aug 23 – Sep 22)

Irrational fears about a relationship may come to the surface today, but you might not be able to talk about your deeply rooted emotions easily. Try not to let your limitations stop you, for negative feelings can be destructive if you keep them to yourself. Make time to have the conversation that you keep postponing. Think about what you’re going to say, and then go for it. It will become easier once you start.

Libra Horoscope
Libra Horoscope (Sep 23 – Oct 22)

You may not be all that clear about what you can do to make yourself happier now, but it’s likely that change is needed in your daily routine. It seems like this should be an easy task, but the closer you get to taking action, the more difficult it becomes. Don’t give up just because you are feeling confused today. Trust in yourself and your clarity will return.

Scorpio Horoscope
Scorpio Horoscope (Oct 23 – Nov 21)

You can’t stop thinking about something that’s been bothering you recently. You intuitively understand that the only way anything will get better is to talk about it until the energy settles. However, it’s difficult to bring your intense feelings out into the open because the resultant vulnerability makes you uncomfortable. Be courageous and move directly toward the source of your discomfort, not away from it.

Sagittarius Horoscope
Sagittarius Horoscope (Nov 22 – Dec 21)

This is one of those days when your head and your heart aren’t reading from the same adventure novel. You may be feeling softer and more compassionate than you are acting as your cavalier behavior masks your vulnerability. Thankfully, you can regain your focus by looking within and exploring your motives for not sharing what’s in your heart. There’s no need to hide behind a false sense of bravado; just be yourself.

Capricorn Horoscope
Capricorn Horoscope (Dec 22 – Jan 19)

You can be a fount of strength if you let go of your own self-criticism for a while. You’re ready to discover how much you have to offer others. Your carefully chosen words have the power to heal, and you have co-workers who can really use your help today. Push beyond any personal resistance to the idea of being a healer and start listening to those around you with an open heart.

Aquarius Horoscope
Aquarius Horoscope (Jan 20 – Feb 18)

Self-doubt can be debilitating today, especially if it prevents you from being part of a crucial discussion. Fortunately, your thoughts are quite powerful and more connected to your core essence these days. Your perspective is desperately needed now, no matter what it is. Share your opinions, but be careful about overstating your cause in order to cover your own uncertainty.

Pisces Horoscope
Pisces Horoscope (Feb 19 – Mar 20)

Your imagination is far more active now that the Moon is paddling through your watery sign. Go ahead and sink into your dreams today, but be wary about using them to escape from the difficult emotions attached to real world circumstances. Fortunately, the symbolism that bubbles up from your unconscious might be the key that clarifies your current uncertainty. Once you are in touch with the meaning, you can change your attitude about what’s happening.

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the daily humorscopes for wednesday, june 22

the daily humorscope

Wednesday, June 22, 2011

Aries (March 21 – April 19)
You will be on your way downtown today, when you will be struck by an odd thought. Fortunately it will bounce harmlessly off you.
Taurus (April 20 – May 20)
Your ACME Rocket Sled arrives today!
Gemini (May 21 – June 20)
You will be afire with enthusiasm today! Unfortunately, someone will put you out.
Cancer (June 21 – July 22)
It’s ok to spill the wine today, if you feel you really have to. Under no circumstance should you dig that girl, however.
Leo (July 23 – August 22)
You will lurk, today. There’s nothing that wrong with lurking, after all, and it’s occasionally somewhat refreshing. In fact, you’ll soon begin work on How To Lurk, a best-selling self-help book on the topic.
Virgo (August 23 – September 22)
Good day to make a call from a pay-phone in a busy place, and say (in a loud voice) “You dumped the body WHERE?.”
Libra (September 23 – October 22)
You will be traumatized by an episode with a stapler, today. You will be unable to even look at a stapler for several weeks, without trembling.
Scorpio (October 23 – November 21)
The mythic asteroid Chaeron, in collaboration with the uneasy spirit of Atahualpa (the last Inca king), will act to produce a gastric upset of epic proportions, today. Keep your chakras clear, and carry some Imodium.
Sagittarius (November 22 – December 21)
Late in the day today you will notice that people seem to be staring at your nose. Don’t worry, though. It’s probably nothing.
Capricorn (December 22 – January 20)
You will get a new job, soon, in which your most important activity will be to periodically “jiggle a little thingy”. While it will pay well, this will prove to be somewhat awkward to explain at parties. Eventually you will hit on the ploy of saying you sell insurance
Aquarius (January 21 – February 18)
It is a joyous time to vaccuum. Yes, you’ll have more fun than you can stand, pushing that new vac around. So what, if other people don’t understand? Unfortunately, an evil asian gentleman named “Fu” will kidnap your beloved vaccuum cleaner, a few years from now, and you will be faced with an ethical dilemma. Enjoy life while you still can, is my advice.
Pisces (February 19 – March 20)
You will attempt to single-handedly bring the “Spaghetti Western” back from obscurity. Your first film will be “A Fistful of Noodles”, in which an aging Clint Eastwood rides into town. This time, however, he will resolve the differences between the Baxters and the Rojos by inviting them all over for a nice pasta dinner.